20 Simple Ways to Get Happy

Happiness is ephemeral, subject to the vagaries of everything from the weather to the size of your bank account.

be happy

We’re not suggesting that you can reach a permanent state called “happiness” and remain there. But there are many ways to swerve off the path of anxiety, anger, frustration, and sadness into a state of happiness once or even several times throughout the day. Here are 20 ideas to get you started. Choose the ones that work for you. If tuning out the news or making lists will serve only to stress you further, try another approach.

1. Practice mindfulness. Be in the moment. Instead of worrying about your checkup tomorrow while you have dinner with your family, focus on the here and now — the food, the company, the conversation.

2. Laugh out loud. Just anticipating a happy, funny event can raise levels of endorphins and other pleasure-inducing hormones and lower production of stress hormones. Researchers at the University of California, Irvine, tested 16 men who all agreed they thought a certain videotape was funny. Half were told three days in advance they would watch it. They started experiencing biological changes right away. When they actually watched the video, their levels of stress hormones dropped significantly, while their endorphin levels rose 27 percent and their growth hormone levels (indicating benefit to the immune system) rose 87 percent.

3. Go to sleep. We have become a nation of sleep-deprived citizens. Taking a daily nap or getting into bed at 8 p.m. one night with a good book — and turning the light out an hour later — can do more for your mood and outlook on life than any number of bubble baths or massages.

4. Hum along. Music soothes more than the savage beast. Studies find music activates parts of the brain that produce happiness — the same parts activated by food or sex. It’s also relaxing. In one study older adults who listened to their choice of music during outpatient eye surgery had significantly lower heart rates, blood pressure, and cardiac workload (that is, their heart didn’t have to work as hard) as those who had silent surgery.

5. Declutter. It’s nearly impossible to meditate, breathe deeply, or simply relax when every surface is covered with papers and bills and magazines, your cabinets bulge, and you haven’t balanced your checkbook in six months. Plus, the repetitive nature of certain cleaning tasks — such as sweeping, wiping, and scrubbing — can be meditative in and of itself if you focus on what you’re doing.

6. Just say no. Eliminate activities that aren’t necessary and that you don’t enjoy. If there are enough people already to handle the church bazaar and you’re feeling stressed by the thought of running the committee for yet another year, step down and let someone else handle things.

7. Make a list. There’s nothing like writing down your tasks to help you organize your thoughts and calm your anxiety. Checking off each item provides a great sense of fulfillment.

8. Do one thing at a time. Edward Suarez, Ph.D., associate professor of medical psychology at Duke, found that people who multitask are more likely to have high blood pressure. Take that finding to heart. Instead of talking on the phone while you fold laundry or clean the kitchen, sit down in a comfortable chair and turn your entire attention over to the conversation. Instead of checking e-mail as you work on other projects, turn off your e-mail function until you finish the report you’re writing. This is similar to the concept of mindfulness.

9. Garden. Not only will the fresh air and exercise provide their own stress reduction and feeling of well-being, but the sense of accomplishment that comes from clearing a weedy patch, watching seeds turn into flowers, or pruning out dead wood will last for hours, if not days.

10. Tune out the news. For one week go without reading the newspaper, watching the news, or scanning the headlines online. Instead, take a vacation from the misery we’re exposed to every day via the media and use that time for a walk, a meditation session, or to write in your journal.

Marriage Advice

Have you ever wondered "what is the secret to a long and happy marriage?" Our collection of tried and true marriage advice tips will help you answer that very question! These secrets to a happy marriage come straight from the horse's mouth -- those who are happily married!

long marriage

1.       Never assume.

2.       Compliment more than you criticize.

3.       For each time you vent about your husband/wife to your friends, tell three positive stories.

4.       Remember that it is ok to do things differently (e.g. there is more than one way to peel a potato or fold the laundry).

5.       Always make time for the two of you.

6.       Marry someone that you enjoy listening and talking to.

7.       Remember that marriage is sometimes a bed of roses and sometimes there are thorns.

8.       Remember that the best gift that you can give your children is to love their mother/father.

9.       Be fair! Split the housework, spending money, etc evenly. This way you are never resentful of your partners contributions (or lack of) or expenditures.

10.   Never go to bed angry. (Unless it's 3a.m. and you're exhausted, angry, and not thinking straight.)

11.   Remember that people do fight. It's how you do it that matters.

12.   Before starting an argument, consider if it's really worth it.

13.   Fight naked. ;)

14.   Agree to disagree.

15.   Never, ever mention the "D" word (divorce).

16.   Do you want to be right or do you want to be married?

17.   Respect each other's privacy.

18.   Remember that "love is like childhood. You need to learn to share."

19.   Marriage is not 50/50, it's two people giving 100/100 all of the time.

20.   Surprise each other now and then.

Advice for a Good Marriage

5 Secrets to Living Happily Ever After
By Susan Seliger
WebMD Feature

We've all read the statistics: Fifty percent of marriages end in divorce. Are the lucky couples who continue to love and lust and live in relative harmony just that -- people whom the fates have blessed? Over Cupid's dead body! Love isn't a present that gets handed to you; it's a special kind of learned behavior. WebMD consulted the marriage and relationship experts to learn the best advice for a good marriage - five secrets to long-lasting love.

"We're born with the capacity to have a happy marriage, but we still have to work to develop it," says Howard Markham, PhD, co-director of the Center for Marital and Family Studies at the University of Denver and co-author of Fighting for Your Marriage. "Having a good marriage takes education," Markham says. "We have to unlearn some bad habits and acquire other good ones." 

Other experts WebMD consulted agree. The couples who remain close and content are the pioneer-spirited among us who share the same secret formula: When problems crop up, they don't give up. They use the following five basic pieces of advice for a good marriage that can help every couple live (more) happily ever after.

1. Listen Up! "Everybody has the need to be listened to and fully understood," says Jack Rosenblum, PhD, co-founder (with his wife of 29 years) of "Loveworks" couples' workshops and co-author of Five Secrets of Marriage from the Heart. You need to make your partner feel heard, even if that means pushing aside some anxiety or sitting on your hands rather than offering advice when your partner needs to talk. Sometimes "mirroring," or simply repeating what your spouse has said, is enough to let him or her know that you've been listening. For example, say something like, "I understand you're upset because I didn't take out the trash." Or "I hear that you want to talk about what happened at the office today." Provide evidence that you're paying attention to your partner's concerns.

ring,marriage

 

2. Set aside regular couple time. "Early on in a relationship couples talk as friends, they do fun things," says Markham. "But over time, those ways of connecting change." Work, family, financial woes, all have a way of overtaking daily life and eroding the sense of fun that brought you two together in the first place. Bring the fun back - even if you have to schedule it in the calendar once every week. Sharing a physical activity, like a bike ride or a walk around the block, is especially good for lifting your spirits along with your heart rate. Activities like going out for an intimate dinner, staying at home and playing music from your college days, or watching a favorite movie (will help you both remember why you chose each other. If cash is in short supply, trade off babysitting with a friend and plan a picnic in the park. There are 168 hours in a week: make a commitment to devote at least two of those hours to your marriage every week.

10 Ways to Feel Better About Yourself

Everyday, you have another chance to make things better.

Some days are better than others. On those days that go less well, we usually end up being hard on ourselves. Here are some tools to avoid doing so.

1. Keep going. Don't let life's changes throw you off track, but remember that most extenuating circumstances are temporary. Gain more clarity by staying the course and channeling your energy in a positive direction.

2. Trust yourself. Believe in your inner resources, no matter what, and you'll grow from the experience. I believe that the answers usually lie within and you are probably smart enough to figure out what you need to do. Give yourself a little time and have patience.

3. Be friends with life. Remember that the world is not out to get you and it does not punish you. You do that to yourself. Learning to focus on other opportunities or in another direction can give you some perspective.

thinking about have a feel better

 

4. Watch your thoughts. Your thinking will never be 100 percent positive. You must learn to dismiss the negative thoughts and stay open to other ideas that will help you move in a positive direction. Start recognizing negative thoughts and use your mind to quell them.

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21 Ways to Have Fun …

1.      
Always wanted to visit Japan? Have a passion for Paris? Go to the local library and plan a dream vacation using the maps, cultural books, and travel planners to investigate your destination.

2.      
Write notecards thanking your neighbors for being "neighborly." Stick them in their doors, ring the doorbells, and watch their responses of surprise from behind a bush.

3.      
If you have snow in your part of the country, make sure you take advantage of the mud it makes when it melts. If you don't have snow, make some mud. In either case, get on some grubby clothes, grab some buds, and have a messy game of full-contact Ultimate Frisbee!

4.      
Take your family to watch Little League baseball at the park. Ask your parents if they have sports stories from when they were kids. You may be surprised!

5.      
Most libraries have movies you can check out for free. Try some of the old black-and-white ones with Jimmy Stewart, Humphrey Bogart or Ingrid Bergman.

fun,good time

6.      
Explore the outdoors at a different time than you normally would. Take a walk through downtown when all the shops are just opening. Check into a professionally-led night hike, the kind where you use flashlights. It's amazing how different your perspective can be!

7.      
Browse a used bookstore and reminisce about your favorite children's books. Maybe the store even has a read-aloud-to-kids time you could attend!

8.      
Organize an all-day (or night!) tournament of board games at your church. Invite people of all ages to join in on Scrabble, Sequence, Monopoly, Clue!, Risk, Chess, Checkers, Backgammon, or other favorites. You'll be amazed at how games can start conversations between different age groups!

9.      
Gather all the unmatched socks in your house and make puppets! See how many of your friends you can turn into a sock character.

10.  
Ask your parents if you and a few friends can have free reign in the kitchen for an evening. Create your own gourmet coffee/tea/hot chocolate drinks by experimenting with various spices, syrups, juices, powders, etc. Make a menu of the best concoctions (and a fun list of your worst!) and treat your parents (by cleaning up the kitchen, too).

Bigger Thinking Leads To A Bigger Life

think big

Small thinking creates more dissatisfaction in life than any other single factor. People, by the nature, want to be successful. The human spirit yearns to attain great things. Unfortunately, the general population settles for less than they are capable of. Thoreau summed it up when he said that most people live a life of quiet desperation. The inner desire for all that life offers is typically in conflict with the outer results being achieved.

What is your true greatness Determining this begins with thinking much bigger than you are presently conditioned. In spite of what society teaches, you can have it all. People tend to think in terms of surviving rather than thriving. Focus on your survival and that is what you get. Shift your thinking to thriving in each area of your life and it will be instantly take on new meaning.

Are you trying to leap over the Grand Canyon or a small ravine Both are wrought with challenges that could lead to failure. So why not go for the gusto If you do not succeed at a particular action, you received a valuable lesson. The bigger the undertaking, the more valuable the lesson.

Small thinking leads to small results. Choose any area of life and begin to think of bigger results. Immediately things change in a way previously unimagined. Instead of trying to figure ways to earn some extra money, concentrate doubling or tripling your income. Go after that goal with all the vigor you can muster. Also, have terms such as best, highest, and greatest in your regular thought process.

All great achievement is preceded by big thinking. It begins with the thought, followed by the action, and then the result. However, most people cannot begin to implement this mindset because of selfworth issues. Poor self esteem tells us that we are crazy to think about these things. It questions our intelligence, work ethic, and abilities. The conclusion is that we cannot do it so we need to settle for what we can get. Of course, the spirit within us cries out against this but fear wins out in the end.

The conditioning of our mind was influenced by the people around us growing up. Although they loved us dearly, their insecurities and feelings of inferiority were transferred over to us. Undo this be realizing that you are worthy of all the greatness that life has to offer. Think on the grandest scale to create a grand life.

Many have tried to change their lives by changing their actions. While actions are important for success, they will not induce meaningful change. If the mind limits the ability to create a fantastic life, all the action in the world will go to waste. All of our success is first determined by our thinking. The more room that we allow for our imagination to explore, the greater the potential.

Your life will begin to take on new meaning as your thinking expands. Seek out the different areas where you can begin this process today. Believe that you are capable of creating the magical life that so many crave. Remove the self imposed limits to accelerate your growth

The Secret To Success Through Positive Thinking And The Law Of Attraction

by Spencer Michaels

positive thinking

Ralph Waldo Emerson said - We become what we think about all day long. This couldn't be any truer. What do you think about all day long? Who's going to win on football on Sunday? Do you think about what you're going wear to Sally's party or who Nicole Richie is dating? If you think about trivial things all day long - Don't be surprised if your life turns out trivial.

You can't think about ridiculous, trivial things all day and then once in a while when you're in the mood say, "Oh yeah... and I really want to be successful." According to Emerson - just start thinking about success all the time and it will soon come. Emerson fully understood the law of attraction. The law of attraction is the secret to all great successes. It says that you attract what you think about and focus on.

You can start harnessing the power of the law of attraction today. I don't care if you have the flu, you have two broken arms and 2 broken legs - there's something you can do today that will make you successful before you know it. Start spending a lot of your day just thinking about success. Read and listen to every motivational program you can find. Start using visualization and filling your mind up with thoughts of success instead of worrying about what Jay-Lo and Britney are wearing. C'mon - if your mind is filled up with garbage most of the time, you're going to become garbage! It's as simple as that. Think about what you want long and hard enough and it will come - Action will follow. In the same way though - think about what you don't want and it will come. If you sit around all day and think --- I don't want to end up poor, fat and sick, inevitably you'll end up poor, fat and sick. The mind knows what you fill it up with. Even if your intention is to avoid something - if you think about it enough - it's likely to end up in your life. So don't think about negative things. Don't think about what you don't want or what you want to avoid.

Think positively and only about what you want. Your thoughts become your reality. If you want an amzing life, you must think amazing thoughts. This is not some mystical nonsense. Quanum Physics has proven this to be an absolute fact. Our thoughts radically effect our reality. Try it out for a week. Can you do it for that long? For one week, I want you to be very careful about what you think about. Think big, think positive and know that you will get what you think about. Don't let anyone distract you from this for this one week. Avoid negative people for this one week. Only think positive thoughts and dwell on what you want in your life and watch your life start to transform before your eyes.

Use The Science of Getting Rich To Learn The Law of Attraction

by Matt Jurs
What if as you go through your day it was pure so that you can see things that you want, that you simply need to change in your minds eye. Throughout the day you'll muse over these items, then at evening they type into a full vision. Earlier than you recognize it the vision becomes reality.

This can be a situation from The Science of Getting Rich. Story after story of things taking place in just this way. As you continue the observe, in full belief, coming as a baby as Jesus put it, it gets quicker and extra certain.

It takes an entire e-book to lay out the subtleties of it and by having the e book in audio kind you may take heed to it time and again and embed the concepts in your consciousness. Repetition is easy with audio, so many occasions you learn an excellent e-book that pulls you through it like The Science of Getting Rich does, and also you benefit from the guide a lot that you just just want to get to the subsequent page. You promise your self you'll learn it again. How typically does that happen.

With audio the price of revisiting the story is much lower, you simply hit play once more, and you will. On the primary listening you get the primary ideas. Repeated listening will cement the concepts and convey out nuance. With repeated listening it turns into part of you and one can find increasingly more phrases that you just bear in mind and maintain dear. Do this one: "By thought, the factor you want is brought to you; by action you receive it."

By action you receive it, an amazing jewel. You deliver all of this about by your psychological work, then by action you obtain it. This doesn't suggest that you need to figure it all out. It means as you begin musing on these things your mind begins to work subconsciously, creating the circumstances and the circumstances, and then you definately reach out and take it.

That is the whole and unabridged model of the Science of Getting Rich.

rich,money

 

Spring into Happily Ever After: Debunking Olds Myths About Love and Marriage

by Dr. Patty Ann Tublin
There are few things as wonderful as young love, especially when it happens in Spring! Remember when you first met the partner of your dreams? Everything felt so alive, right? You probably felt a general blissful wonder while your endorphins ran on high. Every time you saw or thought of your sweetie, the butterflies churned, and your heart thump, thump, thumped at the mere thought of your new love! Then as time went on, those butterflies took flight and found other couples ready to relish in young love, while you and your partner resigned to be grouchy and cranky in "old" love.
But it doesn't have to be that way. If you grew up with old fashioned stories about relationships based on minimum effort, on necessity or convenience, these three truths will help you understand that there are some key things you have to do to truly live happily ever after.

1. When you marry your mate, you marry their family! When two people come together, how can they not be impacted by each other's families unless they run as far as they can in the opposite direction and have no contact with them at all?! Remember the character Michael in the movie "The Godfather"? He mentions to his girlfriend Kate that he is not his Mafia family, but he ends up being exactly like his father anyway. Families come along with the person you marry. There is no way around this, even if you try to extricate yourself.